How to Have Better Arguments with Your Significant Other
Use these 5 strategies for more productive disagreements.
By Seth J. Gillihan Ph.D.
Courtesy of Psychology Today
No matter how strong your romantic relationship is, at some point you’re going to have disagreements. And while never arguing is an unrealistic goal, arguing better is an essential one.
Thankfully all of us can improve the quality of our communication, including the way we argue. In my recent discussion with communication specialist Oren Jay Sofer on the Think Act Be podcast, I asked for his guidance on how we can communicate more effectively. He noted the following five principles for transforming our patterns of speaking and listening, as detailed in his book Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication.
1. Be present.
Many disagreements start because we weren’t really listening to the other person. Our undivided attention is “the most essential prerequisite of communication,” Oren told me. “We have to be here. If we’re thinking about something else, lost in thought, distracted—no communication actually happens.”
It’s easier than ever to be distracted by the constant intrusion of social media and other alerts. Even when we intend to be present and engaged, we might find our minds wandering off, […]
Sandy Bober shares her personal testimony about being raped in college, her infection with an STD and her struggles and ultimate victory to regain her self-esteem, healthy relationships and a successful marriage.
Here at Love Smarts, we would like to share helpful information including personal stories of relationship successes and failures, insights from psychology and human experience about what leads to lasting love relationships.
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