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Here at Love Smarts, we would like to share helpful information including personal stories of relationship successes and failures, insights from psychology and human experience about what leads to lasting love relationships.

We look forward to hearing from YOU which articles were meaningful and also about what you have learned from your own life experience, whether that was a top-of-the mountain joy or a relationship disaster!

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My Struggle With Pornography

October 19th, 2016|Comments Off on My Struggle With Pornography

At the age of 13, I knew that viewing pornography was wrong, but after one particular day at school in which my classmates had berated me for not looking at it, I had begun to question my own sexuality. Wanting to prove to myself that I was interested in women, I decided to search online for seemingly innocent images of women. However, it was not long before I started searching for increasingly graphic images and eventually pornographic images and videos. Initially, I felt sick to my stomach after binging on these images, but after weeks of viewing the pang of my conscience began to subside. From that point on, I went to porn when I felt that I could not deal with my emotions. Often, when I felt alone, friendless, angry, inadequate, bored, or hopeless I went online to find images of women to make myself forget. Depression and thoughts of suicide were often followed by bouts of searching for pornography and masturbation. Until the age of 22, I was regularly watching porn every day.

Throughout these years of self-abuse, I knew that porn and masturbation were harmful and that I was causing myself to going into deeper emotional pain. Despite this knowledge, I was helpless and unable to quit cycles of anger, porn, masturbation, regret, and self-loathing. Every time I went through this cycle, I promised to myself that I would quit, but I would always repeat it within days. Within the span of 9 years, I could only maintain […]

Testimonies Archive

April 19th, 2016|Comments Off on Testimonies Archive

Dear LoveSmarts,

I am a mother to a beautiful 5 week old baby. I love my son with all my heart but like so many I wish I would have had him 5 years down the road to a man that I was married to. I cannot give my son the cool toys every other kids have, I cannot give him the father that he deserves because he’s not around anymore, I cannot give my son alot of things that he deserves and that makes me sad. I can only give him all my love and raise him to not make the mistakes that his mother made.

Like so many teenagers I thought that drugs and sex were cool, so that’s how I lived my life. I was not carefree, I was reckless. I started dating a guy and our relationship was based on sex. Those are the worst relationships to have. We broke up because we had nothing in common but physical attraction. 6 weeks later I found out I was preg­nant. He said that he would be there for me. He lied. I had to face the world alone and pregnant.

I had the support of my mom and my best friend, which helped, but every pregnant woman needs the father to stand by her to make it really ok. I struggled to save up enough money by myself working 50+ hours a week and that was hell since i was pregnant. Many of my friends deserted me cause what teen […]

Recent Articles

Choose to Be Grateful. It Will Make You Happier.

November 21st, 2015|Comments Off on Choose to Be Grateful. It Will Make You Happier.

By Arthur C. Brooks, Nov. 21, 2015 Courtesy of NY Times TWENTY-FOUR years ago this month, my wife and I married in Barcelona, Spain. Two weeks after our wedding, flush with international idealism, I had [...]

What’s Really Hot on Dating Sites? Proper Grammar

October 1st, 2015|Comments Off on What’s Really Hot on Dating Sites? Proper Grammar

By Georgia Wells, Oct. 1, 2015 Courtesy of Wall Street Journal When Jeff Cohen was getting ready to meet his OkCupid date for drinks in Manhattan, he started to have second thoughts as he reread the [...]

The Good Dad: The Transformative Power of Fatherhood for Men and Children

July 15th, 2015|Comments Off on The Good Dad: The Transformative Power of Fatherhood for Men and Children

Drawing on his new book, "Gender and Parenthood: Biological and Social Scientific Perspectives" (Columbia, 2013), W. Bradford Wilcox details the ways in which fatherhood is a transformative experience for men, both biologically and socially. He [...]

Chicken and egg dilemma about the decline in marriage

March 5th, 2015|Comments Off on Chicken and egg dilemma about the decline in marriage

By Janice Shaw Crouse, March 5, 2015 Courtesy of Washington Times Just as relentless, powerful winds and waves pounding against a strong sea wall can over time bring it down, the institution of the family today [...]

Abstinence Education In Context

February 17th, 2015|Comments Off on Abstinence Education In Context

Two experts in character-based sexuality education, Dr. Thomas Lickona and Dr. Stan Weed, have written an outstanding comparison of a risk avoidance (abstinence) approach with a risk reduction (comprehensive) approach.  For anyone who wishes to [...]

A Psychiatrist’s Letter to Young People About 50 Shades of Grey

February 13th, 2015|Comments Off on A Psychiatrist’s Letter to Young People About 50 Shades of Grey

Miriam Grossman, M.D., child and adolescent psychiatrist www.miriamgrossmanmd.com There’s nothing gray about Fifty Shades of Grey. It’s all black. I help people who are broken inside. I ask questions, and listen carefully to the answers. One [...]